Did you know that it can take as many as 30 times before you finally find someone who you are meant to be with? This underlines the need to have a realistic dating attitude when you go out into the wide world. You could look at it as a numbers game, but it is best not to start counting!
It is best not to put too much pressure on the situation when you set up a meeting with your chosen guy, as if you don’t maintain a realistic dating approach you would put way too much pressure on yourself. Have an open mind and be prepared to go with the flow.
When you have been alone for a long period of time, it is quite natural to feel that you are “due” to meet somebody of your dreams. You must try and put these thoughts to the back of your mind as they may well cloud your judgment otherwise. For example, you might think that your first date went so well that he is definitely the one for you, but really you should be looking for that special spark first.
You may come across a guy who represents the most attractive man you have ever met, but remember that the process of realistic dating requires you to ask many questions and never assume anything. If you don’t, you will not adhere to the highest standards and go through that process of discovery. When the time is right, you gut will tell you what to do.
Before you set out on a process of discovery, ask yourself whether you are really ready to find someone for the long-term. This will require a lot of expenditure in terms of direct costs as well as time and only make sense to ensure that you are ready for what happens.
If you have just left a relationship for one reason or another and have experienced some pain from doing so, you’re not likely to achieve a realistic dating result right away should you jump back into the fray. Take enough time to recover and reassess where everything is and remember that you must be happy within yourself, or it will come across to somebody else.
Always approach a first date from the viewpoint of cementing a new friendship. After all, the most committed marriage always started off on this footing. If you always think this way, you won’t put too much pressure on yourself and in any case may end up with a new friend to share some quality time with.
If it all possible, try and see whether you have anything in common with a dating partner in advance. If he has been recommended to you, does this come from a position of trust? If you have met him at a common venue, such as a sports club or if you know that you share similar values or goals, then this may help in the the long run.
Author Alan Bentley has a lot of information to help you understand realistic dating. A fantastic resource is available at www.cracktheguycode.com.
